In which I introduce the cast

The purpose of this blog is to give me a place to vent. I have another, semi-public blog that my outlaws may or may not know about. I write as if they do, which really cramps my style. I have to leave out a lot of really good stuff, not because I care about what they think of me any more -- no matter what I do, they are not going to like me -- but because they would make my husband's life miserable and I love him and don't want to put him in that position. They knew about my old journalspace blog and did not like me based on it. You know - because I mentioned things like my religious and political beliefs and they did not match their religious and political beliefs and that's a good enough reason to write someone off, isn't it?

I mean, my mom and my husband do not agree on religion and politics and she can't stand him.*

My outlaws will definitely not know about this blog.

I have been married to my wonderful husband, Primo, since September 2008. His father, Sylvester, and mother, Doris, live far from us - an airplane ride away and not a cheap one but hey we're rolling in cash so it's fine, right?

Primo has two brothers. Jack lives fifteen minutes** from Sly and Doris and Ted lives several states away. Jack cannot do Sly and Doris' chores the same way Primo can, though. No, only Primo is fit to repair the garbage disposal. On Thanksiving. Not even a plumber can do what Primo can. Because if a plumber did it, then there would be less money for other things, like bourbon.

* Not true. My mom*** thinks my husband hung the moon.

** Well, Jack lived 15 minutes from Sly and Doris at the time of the disposal incident. He now lives an hour away, which is still closer than the $300 ticket for one plane ride away that we live.

*** My dad died 12 years ago, but he would have liked Primo, too.