Thursday, December 26, 2013

In which a Thanksgiving passes without too much drama

Have you been wondering how Thanksgiving chez Doris and Sly was this year? I have. So I asked Primo, who had spent his Thanksgiving with me, grilling a steak and watching "Brokeback Mountain," and then putting the snow tires on the car and vacuuming and all the fun things that adults get to do with their time and money.

But he was home and not with Sly and Doris so it was a good weekend.

He spoke on the phone with Sly and Doris on Thanksgiving and then again on that Sunday because of course they expect a call on a holiday and then there is the regular Sunday call.

Am I the abnormal one for not calling my mother every week and talking to her for an hour about whatever? For not listening to her complain about how awful the entire world is and how I am her Only Joy (only she would never say that because I am not - my mom has many hobbies that keep her too busy to chat)? Am I a Bad Daughter for not calling my mom every week?

Or do Sly and Doris expect too much and should Primo put his foot down and tell them to leave him alone? (How I wish he would. I have tried to convince him but thus far have not been successful.)

Anyhow. He spoke to them about their Thanksgiving, which they spent with Stephanie, who is my ex sister in law - she was married to Primo's half brother Jack until a few years ago. Sly and Doris almost never have anything nice to say to her or about her yet she is a saint, going over to help them with household repairs and inviting them over for holidays.

Primo spoke to Sly and Doris on Sunday. Doris was telling him that Thanksgiving was nice. As she was speaking, Sly was in the background telling Doris "not to tell Primo about that thing because I don't want it to get back to Stephanie."

So of course Primo reported that odd conversation to me.

"Did they not say anything negative about Stephanie?" I asked.

"My dad said the turkey was dry. He said he could tell the second he walked into the house."

Which I didn't understand - how can you tell if the turkey is dry before you even see it or taste it?  But Sly is a man of many talents and his power is legion.

"Is that what's not supposed to get back to Stephanie?"

"I don't think so," Primo said.

We mused. What could it be? Now we wanted to know.

I texted Stephanie.

  • Me
    What happened at t giving that S didn't want D to tell P about bc it might get back to you?
  • Stephanie
    I have no clue other than the fact that I was exhausted, why what r they saying?
  • Me
    Nothing! D said dinner was nice and S said something to her about not saying anything
    So I was wondering
  • Stephanie
    Why do they always make issues
  • Me
    But maybe it's some stupid R thing

  • Stephanie
    I know he refused to help cut the turkey
    I was so tired n regret inviting them
  • Me
    Because they are whiners
    and you are a saint to invite them!
    He refused to cut the turkey? Why?
    If you had told him he couldn't do it, he would have pitched a fit!
  • Stephanie
    D asked him to cut it n he said no Stephanie is capable of cutting it herself
  • Me
    Oh Lord.
    Whatever.
    You deserve a medal!
  • Stephanie
    I am never inviting them again, they have a son here who doesn't give a crap about them...... I am done!!! Oh n they were upset that I made a cheesecake too
  • Me
    What?
    Who doesn't like cheesecake?
    And even if they don't like cheesecake, all they have to do is NOT EAT IT
  • Stephanie
    I don't want or need drama in my life oh n I think they were upset bc the kids were home all week n didn't go n c them
    It wasn't that they didn't want to eat it they said that they didn't know I was making a pie or they wouldn't have bought 2
    Now I'm twisted! !!
  • Me
    I guess the obvious question of why don't the kids want to see them has never crossed their minds
    Twisted person
  • Stephanie
    Lol should b twisted sister. Lol
  • Me
    Yes! You are my twisted sister!
  • Stephanie
    Yes, i just dont get them at all!!!

Sunday, December 22, 2013

In which there is a very sincere potluck and I am a bad, bad person for thinking it is funny

But come on - don't you think this is kind of funny, too?

Please bring something to share. We do have friends who are vegan, vegetarian, lactose intolerant, and gluten intolerant so please consider making something they could enjoy as well. 

No matter what you bring please label it with ingredients for those with allergies (meat, milk, eggs, nuts, etc)


I think the only food that would work would be water.