Primo: Their cleaning lady gave them a recommendation weeks ago of someone who could come in more frequently to clean and to cook.
Me: Oh good!
Primo: They haven't even *called* her.
Me: What is their plan?
Primo: My
mom can hardly do anything. There were a few weeks' worth of clean
laundry piled up. She rarely puts it away. There were two days' worth of
dirty dishes when I arrived. She often just rinses them and puts them
on the counter, which takes her longer than I take to put them in the
dishwasher and leave everything clean.
Me: They need help.
Primo: I know.
Me: They know that you cannot stay there forever, right?
Primo: It seems that I'm going to have to make a plan (or push them to do so; I mean while I sit here, not just encourage them).
Me: You moving in with them is not an option, even if they think it is. Right?
Primo: Right.
Saturday, July 11, 2015
Thursday, July 9, 2015
In which there are more plumbing problems
Primo: My
dad has soiled two pairs of underwear and peed on the sofa. They are on
the verge of needing full-time care. I've already entertained the idea
of having to stay beyond Tuesday. I don't want to.
Me: Oh man. What a mess. Peed on the sofa?
Primo: My dad can't always control things. He need to pee and got some on the couch. He got mad at me when I didn't get a towel to clean it up quickly enough.
Me: Oh man.
Primo: And when I had to empty the urine bottles and indicated that the task might not be so pleasant, he got mad at me.
Me: At least when my dad was sick, I didn't resent him for not having done what he needed to do to prevent problems. He was 61 and in perfect health and had only a few months before passed a physical. There is nothing he could have done to have made that situation any easier. And my mom was healthy, too. She was only 53. The few times he wasn't in the hospital, she would not let me do anything with him to do with body functions. She did not want me to see him like that and she didn't want him to see me seeing that.
Primo: You were angry at the cancer.
Me: Right. But not at him. Never at him. I had it easier than you do, in a way. I loved my father. I never resented him or felt angry that I was having to take care of someone who was not always nice to me. My dad was a sweetheart. Everyone loved him. People flew from all over the US to his funeral in a tiny town in northern Wisconsin. He had friends all over the world. I hated the cancer. But never my dad. And the one time I lost my patience with him --- I am still so ashamed about that. My sweet dad.
Primo: My dad is very difficult and sometimes mean. I told him I expected to clean urine with you maybe someday, but it's not something you expect to be doing for your parents. He said it was a good thing I had never had kids, then.
Me: But it doesn't make it any less gross doing it for your own kids! It's just that you assumed that responsibility voluntarily! Your dad should be grateful that you are doing this for him, not acting like he is doing you a favor to let you handle his functions!
Me: Oh man. What a mess. Peed on the sofa?
Primo: My dad can't always control things. He need to pee and got some on the couch. He got mad at me when I didn't get a towel to clean it up quickly enough.
Me: Oh man.
Primo: And when I had to empty the urine bottles and indicated that the task might not be so pleasant, he got mad at me.
Me: At least when my dad was sick, I didn't resent him for not having done what he needed to do to prevent problems. He was 61 and in perfect health and had only a few months before passed a physical. There is nothing he could have done to have made that situation any easier. And my mom was healthy, too. She was only 53. The few times he wasn't in the hospital, she would not let me do anything with him to do with body functions. She did not want me to see him like that and she didn't want him to see me seeing that.
Primo: You were angry at the cancer.
Me: Right. But not at him. Never at him. I had it easier than you do, in a way. I loved my father. I never resented him or felt angry that I was having to take care of someone who was not always nice to me. My dad was a sweetheart. Everyone loved him. People flew from all over the US to his funeral in a tiny town in northern Wisconsin. He had friends all over the world. I hated the cancer. But never my dad. And the one time I lost my patience with him --- I am still so ashamed about that. My sweet dad.
Primo: My dad is very difficult and sometimes mean. I told him I expected to clean urine with you maybe someday, but it's not something you expect to be doing for your parents. He said it was a good thing I had never had kids, then.
Me: But it doesn't make it any less gross doing it for your own kids! It's just that you assumed that responsibility voluntarily! Your dad should be grateful that you are doing this for him, not acting like he is doing you a favor to let you handle his functions!
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
In which Sly has - how do I say this? - problems associated with older men and their plumbing
Just was messaging with Primo.
Primo: I am not good at this kind of stuff. He's dripped pee on the bathroom floor, etc.
Me: Oh ick. You never do that. Tell him to sit.
Primo: It is difficult for him to sit down and get up, so he will not sit to pee. Most men don't. I do (except in public bathrooms) because it's neater and cleaner.
Me: So who will clean the pee off the floor?
Primo: I will do it because it grosses me out. I use that bathroom.
Me: No. Once you are gone. [Doris can't do it. She can hardly walk.] Why don't they ask their cleaning lady to come in more often?
Primo: She might do some grocery shopping.
Me: They could pay her to come in and clean more than once every two weeks!
Primo: I am not good at this kind of stuff. He's dripped pee on the bathroom floor, etc.
Me: Oh ick. You never do that. Tell him to sit.
Primo: It is difficult for him to sit down and get up, so he will not sit to pee. Most men don't. I do (except in public bathrooms) because it's neater and cleaner.
Me: So who will clean the pee off the floor?
Primo: I will do it because it grosses me out. I use that bathroom.
Me: No. Once you are gone. [Doris can't do it. She can hardly walk.] Why don't they ask their cleaning lady to come in more often?
Primo: She might do some grocery shopping.
Me: They could pay her to come in and clean more than once every two weeks!
Sunday, July 5, 2015
In which the person who won the primary is the 22 year old son of the man who currently holds the seat
Primo had decided not to run for the county government. We knew that. I was not super thrilled because I thought that was the whole reason he was taking the sabbatical - to give elected office another shot.
But he decided not to run.
And then we discovered that someone on our city council, who would be very good, was running. And another guy whom I don't know.
And the son of the guy who currently holds the seat. I can't remember what I have called this guy in the blog - but he is the one who held the state house seat that Primo ran for. He left the state house after redistricting because he didn't think he could be re-elected. He ran for county government instead. Won that seat. Then when the pay was cut for county government, this guy ran for treasurer, a position for which he is completely unqualified unless you don't care if your treasurer actually has a background in finance and accounting, which apparently, the voters in county do not.
Honestly. People really do get the government they deserve. Or the majority does. I did not vote for this guy. I do not deserve incompetence. I do not deserve this at all.
So this guy wins the treasurer seat, which means his seat on the county government is available. Primo was maybe going to run, but he didn't.
But this guy's son did.
The son is 22 years old.
He lives with his mom and dad.
He thinks he can represent people who
1. have jobs
2. pay taxes
OK. I just checked his campaign page. He does have a job now. And he has been an intern. He says he will bring that valuable experience with him to the government if he is elected.
But. He is 22 years old. He lives at home. He does not pay property taxes. He does not shop for groceries. He does not pay the light bill. He does not deal with adult concerns.
Yet he was one of the two candidates to make it through the primary. Not the guy who has six years on our city council and a very strong record. But the other novice and the kid.
Because stupid voters - yes, I said "stupid" - are voting for him because they recognize the name and either do not know or do not care that he is not his father. (Not that his father was any good, either. Twenty years at the state house and he accomplished pretty much nothing.)
We will get the government we deserve.
But he decided not to run.
And then we discovered that someone on our city council, who would be very good, was running. And another guy whom I don't know.
And the son of the guy who currently holds the seat. I can't remember what I have called this guy in the blog - but he is the one who held the state house seat that Primo ran for. He left the state house after redistricting because he didn't think he could be re-elected. He ran for county government instead. Won that seat. Then when the pay was cut for county government, this guy ran for treasurer, a position for which he is completely unqualified unless you don't care if your treasurer actually has a background in finance and accounting, which apparently, the voters in county do not.
Honestly. People really do get the government they deserve. Or the majority does. I did not vote for this guy. I do not deserve incompetence. I do not deserve this at all.
So this guy wins the treasurer seat, which means his seat on the county government is available. Primo was maybe going to run, but he didn't.
But this guy's son did.
The son is 22 years old.
He lives with his mom and dad.
He thinks he can represent people who
1. have jobs
2. pay taxes
OK. I just checked his campaign page. He does have a job now. And he has been an intern. He says he will bring that valuable experience with him to the government if he is elected.
But. He is 22 years old. He lives at home. He does not pay property taxes. He does not shop for groceries. He does not pay the light bill. He does not deal with adult concerns.
Yet he was one of the two candidates to make it through the primary. Not the guy who has six years on our city council and a very strong record. But the other novice and the kid.
Because stupid voters - yes, I said "stupid" - are voting for him because they recognize the name and either do not know or do not care that he is not his father. (Not that his father was any good, either. Twenty years at the state house and he accomplished pretty much nothing.)
We will get the government we deserve.
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