In which Primo tries to get me to agree to another campaign

After Primo has spent 20 minutes going through everything in the freezer to figure out what we have and what  we don't. I keep a spreadsheet, but apparently, I haven't been keeping up with it, as the Usinger's back bacon was nowhere to be found. Primo gets all verklumpt if I try to find something down there, as he has A System for storage. He does not like me to mess with his System.

His System for his office is Stacks of Paper.

He has a Leaning Tower of Visa, with all his credit card receipts for the past decade.

What we discovered as he was pulling everything out, inspecting it, and putting it back - despite my protests that he should toss out the smoked turkey skin from his friend D's party THREE YEARS AGO - "I have to look at it!" he protested.

"Look at it now!" I said. He had it IN HIS HAND. Look! Look!

"Not now," he said. "Later."

Later  never comes.

Anyhow - we found a bunch of sausage that we got from the Klement's bargain table WITH A GROUPON - so double savings. I knew the sausage was in there because it was in my spreadsheet.

I also knew that I didn't like it.

Sorry Klement's.

They might actually be relations. My mom saw that my dad's grandmother's sister married a Klement but we don't know if it's the same Klement. It looks like it is, though. Not that it would be a big deal. I am already related to a sausagemaker - my uncle Larry - and his sausage has spoiled me for all other sausage. His is so yummy and lean that I can't stomach commercial sausage.

And blesstheirhearts, Klement's makes commercial sausage. So even though we got a deal on all the sausage, it's not a deal if you don't like it.

I suggested to Primo that we could give the sausage away.

He was doubtful. "Where do you donate sausage?" he asked.

I didn't know.

Then he had an idea. "We could serve it at a campaign event!"

"Great idea!" I said.

"But that would mean I would have to run again."

"Not a chance."

So we're stuck with the sausage.