Thursday, March 9, 2017

In which we get a Christmas card for Sly and Doris addressed to them at our address and we cannot figure out how that happened

How? How does it happen that someone - not a catalog, not a charity, not a political organization - has our address as Sly and Doris' address?

I really want to know.

And I want it to stop. I want not to get their mail. I want not to have frequent reminders of them. Our Christmas this year was so much nicer without them. Five years ago, we went to Spain for Christmas and Sly and Doris were furious. They sent Primo an email telling him - these were their words - that he was a "bad son." Sly told Primo that Doris was threatening suicide. Doris sent Primo an email on Christmas day telling him that "everything sucks and I get despondent."

I am not making this stuff up, people. Those of you from nice families might find it hard to believe that parents like Sly and Doris exist, but they do!

But they are finally gone and Primo and I are getting to have a life without their constant demands and drama and it is nice. Am I asking too much not to get their dang mail?


  1. My guess is that someone tried to send a card to their old address and got something back from USPS with their forwarding address, which is (I assume) your address.

  2. Write "Deceased" in large letters and "return to sended" and send it back. Trouble for you, but somehow satisfying!

  3. I'd prefer Christmas (or maybe Chanukah?) cards to collection notices.

    Then again, the lawyer told me to ignore the notices, so I'm telling them in my head to go to hell every time I see one. :)

  4. Be grateful you're not getting phone calls; my sister-in-law apparently listed us as an alternate contact on some bills right before she changed her mind about drugs being bad for her. I've learned that telling them the whole sordid story makes them not only stop calling, but sorry they ever asked.

    I agree with Webb, just write DECEASED and return to sender. Unless the sender is so senile that the information won't be retained, in which case... you may have to move house. Sorry.


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