Wednesday, December 16, 2015

In which Ted asks Primo to reimburse him (from the estate) not only for his visit to see Sly in the hospital but also for his trip for Doris' funeral and for Sly's funeral - AND he wants cash for the frequent-flier miles he used

NB
1. Ted's wife's mother is sick. She is not dead. Therefore, her estate is paying for nothing.
2. The IRS does not allow deductions from an estate for someone who is not the executor. It is moot in this case as the estate is not large enough to trigger taxes, but still.


From: Primo
To: Goldie
Date: sometime
Subject: FW: Reimbursable FL travel costs

He is a completely shameless money-grubbing asshole.

I paid about $300-350 per round trip for my flights, and I flew mostly to/from Orlando to save money.

He wants me to reimburse him $875 per 25,000 airline miles? Delta values those miles at ONE CENT each when using them to pay for tickets.

He wants me to reimburse him for multiple dinners at $40-60/plate? I ate zero expensive restaurant meals.

If he's going to be reimbursed for these costs, we will certainly be reimbursed by the trust for all of your travel expenses in addition to mine.

Primo



Subject: Reimbursable FL travel costs
From: Ted
Date: earlier than sometime
To: Primo

Per Dad’s wishes and my email from last week, here’s the tally of reimbursable, out-of-pocket FL travel costs for me (and, minimally, my son and my wife).

These costs and the repayment thereof are in line with what my wife's mom’s estate has been reimbursing her for travel, with any double-charges relating to [my wife] eliminated. I checked with our CPA and he reminded me to instruct you to write “Non-taxable expense reimbursement” on the memo line of the check.

In the interest of saving money, I used FF miles, which cost approximately 1/2 of last-minute airfares. [My wife] researched the corresponding costs for mileage replacement—and whenever possible she used her elite status to save miles/money for my travel.

As you’re aware, I stayed at Dad's and at [my college friends'], also to save money, despite my severe cat allergies. Also, please note that [my wife's] mother’s estate covered the car rental costs ($500+) to attend Dad’s service. In addition, we’re not tallying the Marriott Awards points used to stay adjacent to Mayo for Doris' funeral. Obviously, I’m not tallying money spent for libations or the night I spent out with [my friend's] band. We can provide receipts or credit card statements if necessary for an audit, as we always do professionally.

(Detailed expense breakdown that I didn't include - GD) 



27 comments:

  1. Oh for FSM's sake, I want to smack Ted more than usual!

    NONE OF THIS BULLCRAP IS AN EXPENSE REQUIRED TO SETTLE SLY'S ESTATE.

    The estate is only ALLOWED to pay for administrative costs, the rest MUST be disbursed as the will directs. Primo has a fiduciary duty to spend wisely in settling the estate and its debts and costs (in other words, do the opposite of what Ted would do) and disburse the remaining funds as directed in the will.

    I hope you told him that your lawyer (Sam) said that's not covered by the estate, and Ted's lawyer should call your lawyer if they're unclear on the concept. My guess is that either Ted hasn't talked to a lawyer, or if he did, the lawyer already set him straight, but Ted once filmed a traffic court proceeding, so he knows better.

    I'm actually glad to see that Primo is getting angry, I was worried he would try to be nice about it and get in legal trouble. Sometimes it's a good and appropriate thing to unleash your inner asshole/bitch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with Cosmic Avenger. I would be SO FUCKING MAD at Ted if I were you and Primo, and I would tell him to FUCK OFF, and then I would stop responding to him. Well, I don't know if I'd actually do that, but this makes me so mad -- and I'm not usually an angry person!

      Delete
  2. Hire a lawyer asap and tell Ted to contact the lawyer from now on. By all means avoid further contact with this men.

    Francesca

    ReplyDelete
  3. I just want to slap Ted.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I imagine that Ted will find it difficult to believe that Primo is being honest or fair in his duties as executor. Most people who try to milk the system/relative for everything they can possibly get out it/them think that everyone else is trying to do the same thing, which usually means they do not trust other people.

    ReplyDelete
  5. OH! I thought Ted couldn't surprise me any more with his money grubbing ways. But he has.
    Get a job Ted, and stop leeching off your family!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! Every time I think he can no longer surprise me, he does.

      Delete
  6. I never realized that my dysfunctional family is really a gem compared to some. We might be dysfunctional, but fundamentally we love each other. I don't see a lot of that coming from moneygrubbing Ted. Ugh. I'm sad for you & Primo that this is his family.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Okay, as much as I hate to admit it, Ted DOES have a point here. If Sly had previously arranged to pay for his travel, etc. then it is an outstanding debt that should be paid out of the estate before any other disbursement.

    HOWEVER. Unless Ted has some proof that Sly said so, it is up to Primo as executor to decide whether it is likely that Sly would have made such an arrangement.

    Ted also does not get to charge for replacement cost, he gets to charge SOLELY for what he spent. If he worked so hard to keep the cost down, that’s a benefit he provided and cannot now turn around and try to reclaim the full cost of that benefit back. He gets to be back where he was before, not BETTER than he was before. So, no. He gets 250 for miles, not 850. Meals cannot go above a reasonable per diem IF such was even part of the agreed on cost. If Ted was staying at the house, Ted had access to a refridgerator and a stove and could have gotten himself some groceries and fended for himself. It was not necessary for him to eat at a restaurant.

    Personally, I would say don’t give him anything. Not one red hot cent. You have a history where you and Primo spent a whole lot of money OOP before Sly started kicking in for the expenses. Therefore, based on that history, it can be assumed that Sly would not have agreed to pay for the first few trips Ted made, thus, so sorry Ted, you shoulda got that in writing (which that jerkoff absolutely will start doing in future I bet).

    - AC

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sly did tell Ted he would help with the expenses for the initial June trip - the one where Ted was supposed to take over so Primo could have a break.

      He did not say, "I will also pay for you to attend your stepmother's funeral and mine when the time comes."

      Delete
    2. "Help with" not "Cover entirely including my choice to eat at expensive-ass-restaurants thinking he's picking up the bill".

      And yeah. Just no on the funeral-attending-expenses. Or does he expect to be paying for Primo to attend his funeral? Just as soon as we finish making it necessary? 8•P

      - AC

      Delete
  8. In other news - When is somebody going to explain to Ted that just because one person does something, not everybody will do it? What TW’s mom is willing to pay is her choice and not a guideline to determine what Sly should have been willing to pay. Seriously – tell this man to go kick rocks. I can’t wait for a lawyer to explain the difference to him (He will probably have my former uncle’s experience. He kept firing lawyers because they wouldn’t tell him what he wanted to hear).

    - AC

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's taken me a while to figure out what was bugging me about these stories, but I finally got it.
      These (hearsay) statements of what "TW's mother's "estate" is paying for" is starting to sound to me like Ted's MIL is being subjected to elder abuse.
      Not overtly perhaps, but I hear an implied, "Give us money/stuff or we'll stop taking care of you."
      TW's mother may not be paying by choice is my point.
      Which makes it EVEN LESS of a guideline for Sly, Primo and the estate.

      Delete
    2. Whoa! That never even occurred to me! Poor woman. I hope that was not the case. (She died a few weeks after Sly did.)

      Delete
  9. When is someone just going to tell Ted he is a total lowlife scum sucking crapbag? Send me his addy, I'll do it. Hell, let's all form a queue, no pushing now... Jxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, you've probably earned that right. Although if Primo puts in a claim to be first you may have to defer...! x

      Delete
  10. I have to ask. What is Jack doing while all of this is going on?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jack is super conflict averse. He is staying in the background, rolling his eyes at Ted and helping Primo out with the house when Primo is in Florida.

      Delete
    2. Too bad Jack isn't telling Ted to back off but I'm glad that Primo has some help. Cleaning out a house can be tedious at best.

      Delete
  11. I do see a silver lining: you still have a great source of material for your blog!

    And yeah, unless Ted has proof of a debt against the estate, it would be completely inappropriate for the executor to take money away from the legitimate heirs.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Grade grubbing students, money grubbing relatives, they all want something for nothing and they all drive me crazy.

    I agree with those above who say to lawyer up and let her/him deal with Ted. Paying Ted off is wrong in principle and also will certainly lead to more requests, each succeeding one likely more outrageous than the previous demand.

    Poor Primo. I too am glad to see that he is mad as hell (and hopefully not going to take it - Ted's shit - anymore).

    ReplyDelete
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Sorry about the new commenting requirements - I have been getting spammed like crazy.