Primo [on phone]: [ring ring]
Me: I know you're not calling me because you messaged that you would be home at six so we could get to the play on time and it is now 6:11.
Primo: Something bad happened!
Primo: It was 5:52 and I was walking past Roberto's house and I thought, "I have the perfect excuse to get the signature and get out!"
Me: Oh no! You didn't stop!
Primo: But I did - and he STILL kept me! He can talk!
Me: Like what? About what?
Primo: He asked, "Who's your campaign manager? You have to pick one! You need to run it by me!"
Me: Oh gosh.
Primo: He said, "We need to come up with a strategy to win this district!"
Me: Yeah. He talked about that last time. That's all he wanted to talk about last time. We needed someone to deliver yard signs but he wanted to re-do the strategy one week before the election.
Primo: Then he asked, "Do you know people to talk to about campaign managers?" I told him he had met B at that campaign event at our house and he said, "I met B and you need someone with more skills than that!"
Me: We are not hiring a campaign manager! What we need is someone to collect nominating signatures.
Primo: I think I could get him to do that, but I would have to spend an afternoon listening to him. He is a really nice guy---
Me: But he is not focused!
Primo: I told him we are not hiring a campaign manager this time - that we hired one last time and it was a disaster, plus we don't have the money this time because I am not working. And I promised you that we would not spend money.
Primo: I thought if I told him you and I were going to the theatre that he would just sign, but he said, "Come in! Come in! Let's talk!"
Me: You didn't go into the house, did you? Because that would not have been a good idea for getting out of there quickly.
Primo: Yes. I did.
Me: Ouch. Big mistake.
Primo: I know. He's so excited about the theory.
Me: But right now, you just need someone to circulate nominating petitions. Bless his heart.
Primo: I know. Bless his heart.