Tuesday, January 10, 2017

In which Primo slips into a mild existential crisis and realizes he might not be sleazy enough to be a politician

Primo: I am despondent.

Me: Why?

Primo: Because I have no legacy. My life has been nothing. We don't have children. We have accomplished nothing of significance. I probably won't win this election.

Me: Welllll.....

Primo: What's it all been for?

Me: I don't know.

Primo: Plus I don't think I would be a good politician. I went to an event last night and I had to be all nice to the county administrator even though he keeps giving money to my opponent. The administrator and I are in the same party! Why does he support my opponent?

Me: Because he is a pragmatist and your opponent holds the office now and the administrator just wants to be able to work with him.

Primo: But he doesn't have any principles!*

Me: Most politicians don't.

Primo: I think he is just interested in power.

Me: Uh huh.

Primo: But that's not what it's supposed to be about! It's supposed to be about making things better for the community!

Me: I know. But most politicians are kind of sleazy and they're in it for themselves. You are way to honest for that.





* There is plenty of other evidence to support this point. I don't think there is anything wrong with being pragmatic, but the county administrator is a rich kid who bought the office with his dad's money and has never had to rely on working to support himself. I don't like the way he operates.

Monday, January 9, 2017

In which Ted decides that he is a 12 year old jerk, which we already knew - and for the record, William, Stephanie's son (who may have other names in this blog but I can't remember them), has always gone by "William" and never by "Billy"

  • Monday

  • 9/26, 7:32pm
    Stephanie 


    Hello sil, I think Ted is about to get told off!!!!!

  • 9/26, 7:48pm
    Goldie 


    really? what's going on?

  • 9/26, 8:08pm
    Stephanie 


    He keeps calling William....Billy. As silly as it sounds, he is doing it because, I told his mother she couldn't cal him Billy....such childish behavior 😣

  • 9/26, 8:22pm
    Goldie 


    WHAT A DICK

  • 9/26, 8:23pm
    Stephanie 


    YUP....a DICK wrapped up in an ASS!!!!

  • 9/26, 8:25pm
    Goldie 


    He is doing it JUST BECAUSE HE WAS ASKED NOT TO?

  • 9/26, 8:26pm
    Stephanie 


    Yes, he and his snooty sister think they're funny. They even had Ted'sSon say it, how childish....

  • 9/26, 8:35pm
    Goldie 


    I don't understand. I really do not understand.

  • 9/26, 8:39pm
    Stephanie 


    Do we ever really understand his childish behavior......just an ASS!

  • 9/26, 8:48pm
    Goldie 


    Well - William has a chance to show Ted how to be an adult. "Uncle Ted, please call me William. That is the name I use." And if Ted won't do it, then William can just ignore him. Honestly.

  • 9/26, 8:50pm
    Stephanie 


    True, but William won't cause waves, so I told him politely. Next time not so much!
  • 9/26, 8:52pm
    Goldie 


    It's OK to cause waves when someone is being a jerk as long as you start out nice!

    And really - it's not like William needs anything from Ted

    Ted has nothing William wants

  • 9/26, 8:57pm
    Stephanie 


    True, honestly Ted has nothing that anyone wants, including his pompous attitude.....
  • 9/26, 9:00pm
    Goldie 


    but - he is an ARTIST!!!!

    he DOESN'T CARE ABOUT MONEY!

  • 9/26, 9:06pm
    Stephanie 


    Unless it's Ted'sSon's money.....ugh!!!

  • 9/26, 9:07pm
    Goldie 


    It's easy to not care about money if someone else is paying the bills

  • 9/26, 9:08pm
    Stephanie 


    Exactly!!!

  • 9/26, 9:08pm
    Goldie 


    I liked not caring about money

    It was a great deal

    for me

    not so much for Primo

  • 9/26, 9:13pm
    Stephanie 


    Never cared about money, never will! He is driven by money, just sad he doesn't know how to make it!

  • 9/26, 9:14pm
    Goldie 


    Maybe nobody has ever explained the concept of "work" to him?

  • 9/26, 9:17pm
    Stephanie 


    Nope, he's a Producer.....

Thursday, January 5, 2017

In which someone from Primo's party calls Primo a "pusillanimous troll" for saying he's going to vote for the party candidate instead of a third-party candidate

Which seems kind of odd to me as third-party candidates have not done well, at least not in recorded history, but perhaps the name caller knows some strange magic that is unavailable to the rest of us, a magic where Ralph Nader does win instead of screwing it up for the Dems.

I have always found that calling someone an  insulting name is the best way to get him to do what I want. Primo agrees with me and told this person, "Thank you for showing me the error of my ways! I will change now. I will vote for the third-party candidate and that candidate will triumph and we will all be happy!"

Sunday, January 1, 2017

In which Primo doesn't want my mom to use the Good Glass

Mom: Which glass is mine?

Primo: I don't know. Just take a clean one from the cupboard.

Mom reaches for a glass and selects not one of the brewery souvenir glasses but something Primo got at a political event and labeled as such.

Primo: But not that one!

Mom: What?

Primo: Not that one.

Me: Why not?

Primo: What if it breaks?

Me: Because my mother is in the habit of throwing glasses to the floor?

In which my mother OF COURSE is a net benefit to our house instead of a timesuck

My mom just asked if there was anything she could do to help. I asked her to repair the loose doorknob on the upstairs door. Was that wrong?
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Amanda Nope. If they ask it is best to give a task. Otherwise they create their own!
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Goldie My mom: It's just the set screw. Do you have a flathead screwdriver? If not, I can get one from my car.

Saturday, December 31, 2016

In which Primo interrupts an early bird special while he is doing doors


In which we have the way it was supposed to go vs the way it actually went - a confluence of unfortunate events

This is how it was supposed to happen.

2:00
Primo: The artist still hasn't finished the work for the flyer. B and I drafted something that I will just sent to a printer. What do you think?

He shows me a draft of three slips to a sheet of paper - each piece has his name, his photo, his contact information, and a brief summary of his policy positions. It's nice.

Me: That looks good. Are you going to have time to go to the store before my mom gets here?

Primo: Yes. And why don't I make the fish tonight instead of tomorrow?

Me: But I was going to make falafel.

Primo: But this stuff will be done and it will work better for me to have the fish tonight.

Me: You're sure?

Primo: Yes. Can your mom wait until 6 or so to eat? Or do we need to have it ready when she gets here at 4:30?

I call my mom, get her ETA, ascertain her hunger status.

Me: Six will be fine.

And then Primo goes to the store, my mom arrives, we cook, we eat, we laugh.

This is how it happened, only this is the condensed version without all the Drama

4:45
Me: Are you going to the store? Because the library closes at 5 and you said you would also pick up my books.

Primo: Oh yeah. I need to go to the library on the way there, which messes everything up.

[The store is on the right side of the road from us, the library on the left, so the logical path is store first, then library on the return.]

My mom texts that she is stuck in a traffic jam and will be late. Wait. She did that  before 4:45 because she was supposed to be here at 4:30. Then she sends another text now.

Primo calls from the grocery store - do I really want two bunches of gladiolus? They are so big! Yes I do.

Primo gets home, brings in the groceries, and goes upstairs to finish vacuuming the guest room.

I start putting away groceries.

My mom arrives.

Unpacking her car is - well, blessherheart she does not travel light. Love that woman. Prepared for anything.

5:30
Primo makes a marinade for the salmon and puts it in the fridge and starts the rice, which will take about 20 minutes. I wash the spinach and toast the pine nuts. I set the table.

Primo: The guy wants too much to make those color copies. I can't get online to find another shop.

Me: Deal with that now. We are not starving. You will be able to relax once the order is sent.

6:00
Primo dashes down to the basement, messes with something.

6:15
My mom and I chat - neither of us are starving, which is weird.

6:30
We hear thumping, swearing, and Drama coming from upstairs. We ignore it.

6:45
Primo comes downstairs: Is the internet working?

Me: Yes, why?

Primo: I figured out that the reason it has been so flaky for the past months is that the cable has gone bad.

Me: What?

Primo: It's eight years old, so I guess it would happen, but I never touch it. I had to replace the one up in my office with the one down by the TV.

Me: So now you will have to replace the one by the TV?

Primo: No. We don't use that one anymore. But the one that we use is behind my desk and I can't get to it easily. I had to climb over my desk and work it in.

7:00
Me: Have you sent the order?

Primo: No. The place I looked at charges too much and I couldn't look at other options because I couldn't get online.

Me: Are you going to send it?

Primo: No. I am going to have to go in person because it's too late to have something done by tomorrow morning.

7:45
Primo grills the asparagus and the fish. I make the spinach with the pine nuts. We eat.

Friday, December 30, 2016

In which A Sign shall guide them

My mom: I had forgotten exactly which house was yours but when I saw all the political signs in the yard, I knew I was in the right place.

In which I channel my inner Theresa May


And then these happened.

Thursday, December 29, 2016

In which Primo is all stressed because the graphic artist who is designing his campaign literature is not done as he promised he would be and now Primo will not have any literature for the coordinated campaign this weekend, which is a pretty big deal


This is the sort of thing where I want to say, "But you should have taken care of this weeks ago!" but that would not be the proper response. Not only that, but I don't know how things work in politics. All I know is what it's like to try to do it on a shoestring with almost no help from anyone and certainly not a family fortune behind us or big contributors giving us tons of money so we can hire People to Handle Things for Us.

Whatever the reason - the guy promised Primo it would be done and it isn't and there are only (how many weeks? Not many - today is Sept 15 - only six weekends or so until the election, so if Primo cannot get campaign material into the hands of the volunteers who are doing a coordinated campaign on Saturday, he will have lost 17% of the available campaigning time.)

We have come up with a workaround - Primo will design a little piece that he can print himself at Kinko's. Better than nothing, but still. Too much drama.