Primo didn't get to call Sly and Doris until after the drinking had started today. He was at a political event this afternoon - a football-watching party with the Teamsters - and wasn't home until after 3 p.m. our time, which is when they start drinking. Sly and Doris, not the Teamsters. I don't know about the teamsters.
Sly and Doris are upset with Primo and with me because I am taking him away from them and because he will not take control of our relationship and get me in line, which is fine fine talk from ultra-lefty and, one would assume, feminist Sly.
"My mom is not doing well. My dad says that she is hardly eating and gets most of her calories from alcohol and that she has the runs all the time."
"That's dangerous," I said.
He nodded. "I am really worried about her. It looks like she'll go first. But then what do we do with my dad?"
"Maybe we bring him up here to live with us," I joked.
Sly gave instructions to Primo that he is to get me in line and repair the relationship. Sly, apparently, is "hurt" that I do not have a relationship with them and that even though I write letters to Doris, I don't even acknowledge Sly exists. He is also upset that I do not visit them with Primo.
"Which makes no sense," Primo says, "because if you were with me, they would not have me all to themselves."
"He doesn't even like me," I said. "Why does he want me there?"
"So he can criticize you."
"Am I a bad person for not wanting to go there to be criticized?"
Primo shook his head.
I ask you, reader. Am I a bad person for not wanting to visit Sly and Doris just so Sly can beat me up?