Monday, September 22, 2014

In which someone takes a trip to Stockholm

  • Primo
    I talked to my parents again. My mom is trying to be upbeat, but my dad is concerned and I think I should still go.
    You were right about the sandwich. It was a decent sandwich if a comparison to really good banh mi is not involved.
  • Me
    Does your dad still miss me?
  • Primo
    They want you to at least acknowledge his existence.
    What you write is to my mom only. and never mentions him.
  • Me
    Fine. I will write "Dear Sly and Doris"
    But he never writes to me. Only your mom does
  • Primo
    My mom asked that you not fail to respect him because he has sometimes been mean.
  • Me
    I am supposed to respect a man who has made her cry?
  • Primo
    He did raise me, so he can't be all bad. There is only one story about him as a father that's really bad (the black eye).
  • Me
    yes, but I have seen him be really mean to your mom
    and I cannot respect that
    and giving your own kid a black eye?
    that's really bad
    but that's not something you and I need to resolve
    he is your father and you love him
    and that's OK
  • Primo
    I know, sweetie. But if you don't respect him (ever), it also hurts her.
  • Me
    but I do not have to like someone who is mean
    not that I would disrespect him to his face
    not that I care about his feelings
    but he takes it out on your mom
    and I am not going to make her pay for it
  • Primo
    But you did disrespect him during the episode at Stephanie's.
  • Me
    if your mom were dead, though, I would be blunt with him
    Oh yeah!
  • Primo
    And by not offering oatmeal.
    And by being a bad bacon eater.
  • Me
    Telling him to knock it off because Maria
    had not mispronounced the word!
    your dad is a little bit overly sensitive, isn't he?
    Did you tell your mom that one of my issues is the way he treats her?
    Of course, she will defend him -
    if she acknowledges that his treatment is bad, she would have to do something about it
  • Primo
    It's too late for her to do something about it. She needs to make the best of what she has left.
  • Me
    but that is between them
    I know
    But does she understand that I am on her side?
  • Primo
    It doesn't help for you to be "on her side" when that means being against him. Except for when I'm visiting, he is all she has left.


  1. I feel like conversations like these should remain private or be discussed in therapy sessions. This feels like you're airing out your hubby's family's dirty laundry and it's a bit uncomfortable to read. I do find this blog very entertaining otherwise!

    1. Oh Melinda! This is rinse in water laundry! The really dirty stuff is in the archives. :)


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