Primo had to change Sly and Doris' mailing address to our address. He couldn't just tell the PO to dump everything. There are still bills for the house and someone has to pay them and that someone is Primo, which is OK because that is part of the deal.
Have I ever told you how I feel about junk mail?
I hate it.
It took me a year to almost eliminate the junk mail we were getting once I married Primo. I never got that much because I have always been hyper vigilant and shut that stuff down right away. But Primo used to get a ton of it and I made it my mission to stop it. First, it's wasteful of paper and gas and postal office time and second, it's a stupid waste of time to sort through it.
Once Primo agreed that I could cut the junk mail off at the source - he is a super control freak and didn't like the idea of my making decisions about what mail we get and what mail we do not get so this took a few years of negotiating LORD HAVE MERCY YOU GUYS engineers make great husbands as far as fixing things around the house but trying to get them to change an existing process is almost IMPOSSIBLE. And for them to trust someone else to do something? Honestly.
It took me a year. A year of identifying the junk mail with Primo, then emailing the vendor (having to track down the source of the junk first) to say, "Take us off your list. No, really. No, we do not want your cheap nasty products. No, we do not want your nice products. If we do, we will find you, I promise."
And they would promise to take our names off the list but then they would send us more junk or something would happen to trigger a new Junk Mail event and it took for darn ever.
But today, we get hardly any junk mail.
Sly and Doris got a ton of junk mail. They got almost every catalog that existed. I guess the green pear people (bless Doris' heart for trying to send us pretty things) figured that anyone who would buy a green glass pear will buy just about anything and that's a mailing list name you can sell.
Their house always had piles of junk mail. Going through their mail was their morning activity.
I always thought that was an interesting approach - that two people who were so staunchly environmentalist who condemned waste in others were very happy to have pounds and pounds of wasteful mail coming to their house and were happy to run their A/C all the time instead of opening the windows.
But their house, their rules. Whatever.
But now. Now all their mail is coming to us.
All their mail.
Including their junk mail.
Again, they are reaching from the grave.
We are getting their junk mail and that is not even the worst part of it.
We are getting things like mailers from Crate and Barrel.
I like Crate and Barrel.
Did Sly and Doris actually get those catalogs? Did they order from Crate and Barrel?
How can it be that they had access to the Nice Things at Crate and Barrel that I would actually have liked -who can't use more cloth napkins? - but they sent us green glass pears instead?
I know I am a bitch.
But man. It wasn't even that they didn't know that there are nice things you can get for a person. They just didn't want to.