Thursday, October 1, 2015

In which Primo and I discuss the sleeping arrangements for Doris' funeral

Me: I know it's way too early to talk to your dad about this, but it's something for you to think about. If I am going to spend three days there for your mom's funeral, maybe you and I could work on getting some of the stuff out of the house.

Primo: Yeah. My mom's stuff can all go.

Me: I don't want to sit around doing nothing.

[Translation: If Sly is home, I do not want to sit all day on the sofa waiting for him to criticize me.]

Primo: We'll figure it out. Ted and his wife might be staying, too.

Me: What?

Primo: If my dad is not home yet, then they would just stay in my mom and dad's bedroom.

Me: Three days with Ted?

Primo: Yes.

Me: Oh man. You know I really love you, right?

Primo: It's my mom's funeral!

Me: I know. But Ted. I will have to slit my wrists. I don't think I can stand being in the same space with him.

Primo: I have stayed with your relatives!

Me: All of whom like you and are nice to you! [Except Licking Pat. But even she was not mean. She was just rude.]

4 comments:

  1. Can we Crowdfund you a hotel room?! Three days with Ted & his wife...plus the stress of preparing for Doris' service & dealing with Sly in person...you may have an embolism trying not to go off on one of them! In my family, we've all been uptight at times before memorial services and during the first attempts to deal with the "stuff" - and we get along with each other! Good luck!

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    1. Emma, I love that idea. :) I still have some xanax from my friend L - she mailed it to me before my last trip there! That plus some booze should make it OK, right?

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  2. This is a time to stay in a hotel! Period! If anyone protests, just repeat, "This works best for us," over and over, if necessary!

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    1. Preach, Tricia. The broken record technique. I have been trying to explain to Primo that just because someone asks him a question does not mean he has to answer it.

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