The things I have from my grandmother - her strudel cloth, her Door County Cherries tins - and the things I want from my mom - the yellow mixing bowl that she used for making cookies and everything else - are things that remind me of them and the times we spent together, the times they spent teaching me to do the things they loved to do.
I did not ask for my grandmother's strudel cloth so I could sell it. (Not that I think there is a secondary market for strudel cloths. But even if there were - that would not be why I wanted it.)(Unless I could sell it for $100,000. Then I would totally sell it and I know I would have my grandmother's blessing.)
I asked for it because when I use it or even when I see it, I remember making apple strudel with my grandmother and how much I loved her. It brings back happy memories and I see her beautiful hands, veined and spotted with age, pulling that dough so thin you could read a newspaper through it.
I want these mementos because they make me happy. They remind me of the people I love.
But this - this is not the prose of someone who wanted a totem. In the email that included the spreadsheet asking for $156K, Ted'sWife also wrote,
Also, I’m grateful to receive Doris' jewelry as a keepsake; I love(d) her very much and shall especially treasure her possessions. So far, our jewelers have determined that everything is costume jewelry—not that it lessens its value to me and us.
What is up with that? Is that a passive-aggressive note that Primo needs to keep looking because THE GOOD BRACELET still isn't in Ted'sWife's hands?
(I think she thinks that Primo is saving the Good Jewelry for me. I would tell her that the last thing I want on my body is anything that Doris owned. I do not want a daily reminder of her. But I can't say that because Ted'sWife gets all "I worshiped the ground that saint walked on!" and what do you say to that? Besides, I don't care if I convince Ted'sWife about anything. It doesn't matter. She had her own Doris experience and that's fine.)
Who takes gift jewelry to a jeweler? Why would you do that? I think we can be pretty sure that Sly was not buying Doris any jewelry so expensive that it would need to be insured, i.e., need an appraisal.
1. They never went anywhere! Who buys expensive jewelry to leave in the house?
2. I can't imagine Sly doing anything nice for Doris. He wouldn't even drive her to book club.
3. Doris was not a dressing-up kind of lady. She was an old t-shirt without a bra kind of lady. No judging - I am the unbathed person who wears (the same) gym clothes all weekend while I lie on the basement sofa watching season 4 of "Scandal" on one click of the FF button. Right now, I am wearing makeup - eye shadow and mascara - only because I wore it to work today. I am wearing no jewelry. None. Which only strengthens my argument. I actually do have expensive jewelry that I used to insure. (Now I just hide it.) And I never wear it. I cannot see Doris ever asking for something fancy.
Now that we have all agreed that Doris probably wouldn't have super expensive jewelry, why would Ted'sWife - who had said Doris WOULD NOT HAVE WANTED A MANICURE because she wasn't that kind of person (she implied that Doris was above such petty thinking as personal grooming and glamour) - be thinking there was a diamond tennis bracelet hidden somewhere that Primo is keeping from her?