Wednesday, February 3, 2016

In which Primo takes off the gloves with Ted, who has been a complete jerk

Primo has drafted an email to Ted.

"This is going to make him furious," he said. "He went off on my parents when they started an email with, 'Let's be clear.' He said, 'Let's NOT talk about 'let's.'"

"Good," I said. "He has become an audacious pain in the neck. Every time I think he can't be more presumptuous, he does something new."



From: PrimoTo: Ted


I apologize for not getting back to you until now. It took a bit longer than I expected to gather some information.


I decided to call [the insurance company] about Dad's life insurance policy and learned that you had called to provide notification of his death on September 14.  You did not discuss that with me before calling (which you should have done) or even inform me that you had initiated contact with [the insurance company]; all you did was write"I received a [insurance company] letter about our parents' trust." I wondered why you had received such a letter and was surprised to learn that you had requested it! I would probably not be upset if you had informed the  [insurance company] claims representative that the claim form should be sent to me and provided my name and address, but your action (requesting the form and then asking me to help you complete it) was way out of line. I don't know whether you were thinking that perhaps you were one of the life insurance beneficiaries, but you could have asked me and I could have told you that the only beneficiary is the Drunk trust. (I have the original certificate of insurance and the beneficiary designation forms from 2005.)


Let's get some things straight here:1. It's not "our parents' trust." It's my parents' trust. We have the same father but not the same mother. You loved my mother as a member of your family, but your mother is still alive.2. Neither of us is a beneficiary of the trust, but I am the trustee and you're not.3. I am Dad's personal representative, and you're not.As trustee, I am responsible for receiving the insurance payment and for (eventually) distributing it to the grandchildren's trusts. I have Dad's death certificates. The responsibility for filing the claim is mine. [The insurance company] is sending another copy of the claim form to me; I will complete it, attach the required documents, and receive the insurance payment.  I haven't been a hurry to file the life insurance claims because the trust is the beneficiary of both policies; it will be a while (probably on the order of a couple of months from now) before the kids' individual trust accounts are opened and some of the trust assets are available for their benefit.


There are two other open issues between us at this point,  your son's educational expenses and the ongoing controversy over a piece of jewelry. I will send a separate response to your wife's email regarding those topics. Although each of you requested in the applicable email messages that we discuss these issues by phone, I don't wish to do that. I prefer to correspond about sensitive issues by email because it is much easier to be precise in writing and email is self-documenting.


Primo

20 comments:

  1. Way to go. I really like this e-mail. And whether or not Ted was a beneficiary of the life insurance it is the executor's responsibility to handle this. One point person to handle everything. If anyone can take care of these things what's the point of the executor?

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  2. Bravo Primo for writing that email.

    And life insurance companies do get hush-hush when it comes to death claims. My grandmother's had to be applied to her funeral and the remainder to go to her beneficiaries. That was always the plan, but her policy was through her state job and the amount received fluctuated with how long you lived so complicated math. But they didn't even tell my mother amounts and I think it took them about two days to confirm with the funeral home that a) she was really dead and b) the payout would cover the cost of the funeral. :/

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  3. Yaaaayyy, Primo! You tell him!

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  4. You go, Primo! Proud of him. Know how tough this is, and can't imagine how difficult it would have been for me if my brother had behaved this way.

    Particularly loved his pointing out that "they" were not Ted's parents. Good job. Hope this helped ... altho knowing Ted, I am doubting it.

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  5. Go Primo!!! long time reader, this news elicited my first post. Good for you sir, good for you!!!

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  8. Ted is money-grubbing lowlife scum. He'd fleece his own son and other relatives if he could line his own pockets. Go Primo for (it seems) waking up to this after cutting Ted considerably more slack than was deserved. Prepare for a scrap though because Ted will fight this, and probably expect the estate to pay his legal costs to so do... J xx

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  9. Replies
    1. Catherine from CanadaThursday, February 04, 2016

      Seconded to the standing ovation! Well done!

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  10. Go Primo!!! I now anticipate Ted blowing a gasket. (pops corn and waits patiently for the fireworks)

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  11. NIcely done, Primo. I especially like the fact that Primo signed with his name. That will further irritate Ted.

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  12. I can't wait to read Ted's response to this letter!!!

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  13. I'm also waiting to hear the response. I hope it's AMAZING.

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  14. But I'm sure TedsWife's mother's "estate" allows anyone to contact the insurance company.

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  15. My exact reaction: OOOHHHH SNAP.

    Very interested to hear what Ted's response is.

    And go Primo!

    TMA

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  16. Yes!
    That's some nice razor sharp precision Primo.

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  17. Yes!
    That's some nice razor sharp precision Primo.

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Primo reads this blog, so please keep that in mind in your comments.