Primo called twice yesterday which made me a little bit cranky and then I felt guilty right away because at least I am not the one stuck with a feeble, whiny old man.
Primo: Can you stay until Tuesday?
Me: I thought I was coming back on Monday. The funeral is Sunday.
Primo: I know, but you have the funeral leave--
Me: I am super busy at work! This is a huge project!
Primo: I know, but also, the miles to go back Monday are really high. And I could really use your help on Monday. I need to get my dad into assisted living and I haven't had time to do anything. You could really help me.
[My sister: What is he doing all day down there?
Me: Hanging out with his dad.
Jenny: That's it? Isn't he making arrangements for assisted living and cleaning out the house?
Me: You know what Primo's like. He is not a good multi-tasker. He can do only one thing at a time. If it were you or I in that situation, we would already have that house cleared out and a place for him to move to.]
Me: You mean I could throw away crap in their house?
Primo: Maybe.
Me: Oh man. I don't want to. I don't want to be there.
Primo: But I want you here. And I have done things for your family. Of course, they have always been nice to me. But I went for your mom's 70th birthday and for your brother's 50th and for your sister's wedding, all in a pretty short time.
Me: Yeah, but those were fun events and nobody in my family has ever been nasty to you.
Primo: When my dad dies, you won't have to spend much time. It won't matter what Ted or Jack think. But I need you here now.
Me: Fine.
Primo: Besides, my dad keeps telling me to give you his best. I think his attitude is changing.
Me: He is going to have to do a lot more than tell you to give me his best. That does not make up for the past ten years.
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It's like driving past an accident. I just can't NOT look. What kind of person does that make me. Well, at least one who is sorry you had to deal with all this drama. The death of one's parent is bad enough, if that is all one has to deal with. But this is torture.
ReplyDeleteI know. I have to keep reminding myself that although for me, this is just material, for Primo, this is real and it's so hard for him. I cannot believe there are people who are as mean as Sly - and he is not even that mean on the spectrum of mean/evil.
DeleteI know this sounds horrible, but I can't wait for the funeral.
ReplyDeleteI'm kind of expecting that something will happen like at my grandfather's funeral. Where one of my dad's cousins stood up and talked for 5 minutes, thoroughly insulting the crap out of the deceased in the name of honoring him.
DeleteJust to give you the full picture of how bad that was: How HIS father's talking to him shamed him into being a better man, just imagine it, this working class guy talking to this man with his chest full of salad [hand gesture dismissively waving over the area, referencing Grampa's military honors] like this. Of course, the fact that the man was IN THE ARMY AND POSTED OVERSEAS held no relevance to Grampa's ability to visit their parents more often... No. None at all. Cousin A almost got jumped.
I'm kinda thinking Ted was right up there with Cousin A.
- Anonymous Cat
Oh fmcgmccllc, it gets so much worse!
DeleteAnon Cat, that sounds horrible. I am sorry. What a jerk.
Delete