Saturday, October 24, 2015

In which Ted sends Primo information about urinary tract infections because Primo is supposed to fix Sly's UTI?

1. Primo: I was talking to Ted's Wife and told her how nice it was that he came here for ten days to give me a break.

Me: Some break. He called you all the time.

Primo: I told her except that he called five times a day. All she said was, "Yeah. We're talkers."

2. Primo: Ted just sent a link to an article about urinary tract infections. [Sly has one.]

Me: Because you are supposed to fix it? Because the doctors aren't doing it right?

3. Primo: Jack is kind of annoyed that the service is on Father's Day.

Me: But we can't do it the day before because Jack has some furniture being delivered.

Primo: Yeah. So he can't change the furniture delivery?

4. Primo: We need to know how many people are coming to the service before we can order food.

Me: I just talked to Stephanie. She said Ted and Jack aren't sticking aroun--

Primo: What?

Me: That's what she said.

Primo: They can't stay for my mom's funeral? I know Jack has planned a dinner. He said he knew I wouldn't be able to go because I have to take my dad back to the rehab center.

Me: Wait. He can't delay dinner for an hour while you drive your dad back?

Primo: I guess not.

5. Me: Ask Stephanie if she will pick up the food from the grocery store.

Primo [on phone]: Blah blah blah. She'll do it. She has to rearrange some other things, but she will do it.

Me: And that is why Stephanie has no problems getting boyfriends. Because she is nice. Because she is helpful.


  1. This is why you sometimes have to be OK inconveniencing some people. (It makes it a lot easier when the people you are inconveniencing have no consideration for other people.) Primo should have just made it the day before; one person's flexible obligation should not have moved a group event to a holiday that many people celebrate.

    1. I KNOW! The only good part is that maybe not many people will show up and if they do, they won't stay long. Not like I want to hang out with Doris' friends. (I know. I AM A BITCH.)

  2. Even the fact that you are attempting to work around some schedules is a bonus. My family has this weird idea that funerals have to be held three days after someone dies. I was away for an educational program when my grandfather passed away over a holiday weekend. I had hoped that the holiday would slow them down a bit and allow me to get back to the area in time, but nope. The visitation was Sunday and the funeral was on Monday (the holiday), so I couldn't make it back due to not being able to get a flight and rental car to get me to their fairly rural area. :( Obviously, I'm still a little ticked about it, but it is what it is.

    1. Well, I know it's a Jewish custom to have the funeral ASAP, often within 24 hours. I was told that scholars thought that putting off the funeral is often a way of putting off the acceptance of the loss, which can stall the grieving process, which is part of the healing process. But 2-3 days is not considered a horrible thing, it's just something that is supposed to be done as soon as humanly possible.

    2. Jessica, if it is possible to delay for people who really want to attend, it is a nice thing to do.

      Cosmic Avenger, my friend Ilene has spent a lot of money on plane tickets attending Jewish funerals. I think she prefers her (Christian) husband's family of planning memorial services a month out so everyone can get there with minimum expense.

    3. I can check, but I'm pretty sure we're not Jewish. ;~) (A little joke. We're definitely not Jewish. although I did consider converting at one point. If I had converted when I was younger, I can say that they probably wouldn't have even told me about the funeral at all, sadly.)

      I'm also pretty sure one extra day wouldn't have stalled the grieving process for anyone involved.

      I'm definitely sure that this was a "let's get this over with so we can get on with grabbing as much stuff as we can before others get here to potentially speak up" issue instead.

      (I'll stop there.)

    4. GD, my parents really tried to get them to wait one more day, but they weren't concerned about grabbing a bunch of stuff out of the house before the rest of the out-of-state family got there. ;-) If anything, they were madder about it than I was, honestly.

      My dad had to fight a lot to get some of my grandfather's wishes implemented during the visitation and funeral, and the main reason against doing most of them was "There's no time!" Dad said that they either needed to do them to respect my grandfather's wishes (particularly since he had set money aside for these specific things--but that was money they wouldn't get if it was spent on expenses, you see) or wait until the things could be done properly. Somehow, miraculously, all of his wishes were able to be done in the shorter time all of a sudden! *sigh* Family.

    5. Jessica, I am discovering that greed does not bring out the good side in Ted and his wife. Oh the stories to come.

  3. GD, I am seriously impressed with you. I realize that you're generally blogging events that occurred weeks or months ago. And that you're most likely trying to deal with crazy shit that is going on today in your life. And yet, you're able to open the door on every one of those past incidents and write about them. While trying to deal with today's load of insanity.

    If I tried to do that, I think my frustration, anger and anxiety would pummel me into either near immobility or a frothing rage. Kudos to you -- I hope the blog is helping to lance the negative emotions and let them drain out (at least a little) and ultimately make you feel a little better.

    And thanks for taking the time to write this out. My family also has some serious cray-cray going on, and it does help to read your blog and know that yeah, it's not just me and my (nice normal) hubby trying to deal with a family full of emotional M-80s that are likely to blow at any second. Here's fingers crossed that you and Primo have had a chance for a nice normal week at home.

    1. Thank you, Anon. I have been blogging as things happen but have delayed publication. I would be even crankier than I already am if I did not have this outlet! And even with this, I am bitchy and angry! I wish I could accept Sly and Doris with equanimity and grace and love, but I am just not that nice.

      You are not alone. I wish none of us had to deal with family drama - I really do wonder sometimes if it is me! Maybe I am the reason there is drama! But then I remember that I am a Bad Bacon Eater and I think, "Nope. Not me."

      I hope that we (usually) nice normal people can find comfort here knowing that we are not alone and that there are others who understand our situation. xoxox

      (And thank you for your kind words.)


Sorry about the new commenting requirements - I have been getting spammed like crazy.