Thursday, April 25, 2013

In which Sly threatens to disinherit Primo

Primo went to his mom and dad's the weekend before Christmas for the Annual Tour de Guilt. While he was there, they had their Annual Airing of the Grievances.

Wait. Let me have Primo tell you in his own words:


It must be Festivus here because tonight we had the Airing of the Grievances!  After I spent much of the day working (taking apart and cleaning the sofa, doing a couple of loads of laundry, cooking flank steaks) and we had a delicious dinner, my dad finally erupted with criticism of your lack of respect for him and especially for my mom.  At least he emphasized her, which is consistent with my statements that you should at least try to be on better terms with her.  We'll have to talk more about this after I get home.

I'm afraid that my dad is not acknowledging reality when he thinks of where they might live after this house.  Although he had never mentioned this to my mom, he claimed that he's been thinking about urban condos in Tucson or possibly Brooklyn (!), not about assisted-living places in Florida.

It is very frustrating to look for information about assisted living; I looked up the place that Stephanie mentioned, which my parents say is only for rich folks.  There seems to be no information about costs on the website; they just want to get people to call a salesperson.  I think places like that should be required to post information about prices and terms on the Internet (and in a standard format) to make comparisons easy.

I'll see you soon!


So what happened is that Sly and Doris got drunk (but you knew that part already) and started complaining about me. Sly thundered at Primo that he better make me toe the line and give Sly the respect he deserves as my elder (he is not deserving of respect just because he is older than I am) and repair our relationship.

Primo and I debated about what "repair the relationship" means, as Sly and Doris have no interest in being around me. We finally concluded that they want me to suck up to them, admit I was wrong about everything, and let them reject me.

Sly then told Primo that if Primo did not get me in line, he would disinherit Primo. Primo wants to know why Sly, who is a die-hard leftist socialist, thinks that Primo should have that kind of power over me. "That's not very feminist of him, is it?" Primo remarked.

I noted that Sly thinks the rules are only for other people. I also thought just now that in the history of most revolutions that I know of, even the Glorious Peoples' Revolutions, the women still end up doing the cooking and the dishes while the men sit around and talk strategy. Remember "For Whom the Bell Tolls?" Doesn't Maria end up doing the cooking?

My point being that even the most politically committed men sometimes stick the women with the crap work while the men do the fun part. Not that being killed is the fun part. But bombing things would be kind of fun, I think. Oh, don't shake your head in dismay. You know it would be fun to blow up a bridge. Tell me you wouldn't want to be the one pushing the thingy to ignite the dynamite to blow up a condemned building. It's power and it's sometimes fun to knock things down.

So Sly, although he is a committed lefty, also thinks that women are meant for certain roles and that men are not to assume those roles. Doris has a broken wrist. Sly complained to Primo that he has to do everything around the house and that Doris is "useless," which of course hurt Doris' feelings because she gets tired of being criticized ALL THE TIME, which is what Sly does, and since when is it Doris' job to do everything? Sly retired from his job years ago. When does Doris get to retire?

I'm off track here. Back to the disinheritance.

Primo told Sly coldly that if that's what Sly wanted, that would be fine. Primo would stay up here with me and Sly and Doris could be down there and they could do without visits from Primo.

Good Primo.