Sly and Primo's brother, however - They started it.
Primo has selected gravestones for Sly and Doris. Their ashes (the ones not in my house) are buried in Doris' family graveyard, where her grandparents lived.
Primo's something cousin and her partner live there and have been wonderful in helping get this done. Primo selected the gravestones and has approved the copy for them. This is a small family plot where Doris' grandparents are buried, where her parents are buried, where Primo's sister is buried. It's a Doris-side little cemetary.
The copy on Primo's grandparents' say, "Beloved husband" and "Beloved wife." (Each of these gravestones also carries the name and birthdays and death days of the person.)
Primo's sister's gravestone reads, "Beloved granddaughter."
Doris' gravestone will read, "Beloved daughter."
And Sly's will read, "Beloved husband of Doris."
Oh yes you read that correctly. Sly will be defined for eternity by his relationship to Doris. He was her husband. She is not being defined as his wife.
This - was not completely accidental. A person can get pretty angry five years after his parents' death, after he's had to clean up their messes and settle their estate and finally start thinking about how they treated him.
(PS You are reading my new blog, right? Nothing about Sly and Doris but a lot of politics and feminism.)