Friday, May 11, 2018

The Candidate's Wife: There really was a hidden agenda behind Not Running Again city councilman who has never recognized me when I have answered the door to him in my own house several times

Remember Not Running Again City Council Person (NRA)? The one who tried to intimidate one of the candidates - the one Primo supported - into not running?


NRA tweeted that he is thinking of running for the State House.

As in, NRA would primary Primo.

Oh good grief.

BTW, this guy has four children under 12. He promised his wife he would not run for city council again and that he would resign from all the boards he is on. I can't believe she is still married to him - he has stuck her with all the work at home and I bet she has to take care of him, too. Her life would be easier if he weren't even around - it would be one fewer person to feed and clean up after.

Which means I cannot possibly believe his wife would be happy about NRA running for the State House and possibly winning. He would be home even less than he has been.

(Or maybe that's all part of her plan?)

The only good thing about this potential primary is that NRA comes off horribly in person. I know I am biased because even though he has been to my house three times - and each time, I HAVE OPENED THE DOOR TO HIM AND INTRODUCED MYSELF, HE HAS NEVER EVEN REMEMBERED WHO I AM.

I know I am biased. But someone like that? I don't think he would impress anyone when he is doing doors. Whereas almost everyone who meets Primo - even my aunts and uncles, who are as far away from Primo politically as you can get, likes him. My family adores him.

But we don't want a primary. It would suck resources out of the campaign.

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

The Candidate's Wife: In which Primo and I argue about how to address an envelope

Primo thinks a letter mailed intra-state needs to include the state name.

I say it does not.

We have been arguing about this for ten minutes and we are both very very cranky. I am pointing out to him that when he uses volunteer labor to address a couple hundred envelopes that maybe Labor should get to decide how the work is done.

I also pointed out to him that I have written way more letters than he has and guess what I NEVER put the state abbreviation in when I mail letters and YET THE LETTERS GET TO THEIR RECIPIENTS because the PO cares about the zip code.

But he is an engineer. And a control freak.

Do not let the people you love run for office. You will fight about things you never even thought people could fight about.

Sunday, May 6, 2018

The Candidate's Wife: This is how it works when I do Primo THE FAVOR of taking photos for him

Primo wants photos of himself standing in front of the yard signs for two city council candidates he is supporting.

Here's how it works.

We go outside.

I go back inside to put on my winter coat.

I go back outside.

He fusses with the yard signs.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

Finally he is ready.

I take photo after photo after photo. It's cold and electrons are free. I try to get good composition with no trees coming out of his head and without his face being distorted.

Primo: Stopstopstopstop! Waitwaitwaitwait!

Me: What?

Primo: You're moving too fast!

Me: It's COLD!

Primo: Butbutbutbut!

Me, moving like a pro, talking to myself about trees and roofs and getting everything in the photo

Me: There. That's enough. Let's go inside. You can take a look at what we've got.

Primo: I CAN'T PICK FROM 20 photos!

Me: Why not?

Primo: I can pick from five. I can't pick from 20!!!! How am I supposed to choose?

Me: It's for a facebook post! That's not even about you! It's supposed to be about the city council candidates you support!

Primo: It's too many!

Me: Fine. Give me.

I scroll through the photos and instantly delete the ones that are OBVIOUSLY bad.

Me: Here. Look at these.

Primo: But my eyes are - squinty. That's why I wanted you to say, "One two three!" and let me pose!

Me: Ummm. But your eyes ARE squinty when you smile!

Primo: They are?

Me: Yes. That is how you look.

Primo: Oh.

Me: Pick one. I'm cold. Those are good enough.

Primo [engineer stuff about how he will have to upload from my camera to his computer because if I message the photos to him, the resolution won't be as good]

Me [back to Chicago Med - yes, I am that lazy on a weekend. Don't judge. I had two major deadlines at work this week and I am wiped out.]