In which I am getting even angrier at Sly and Doris for leaving their affairs in such disorder - if you love your children, get your act together and throw away your 40-year old papers so they do not have to spend weeks sorting through your junk. Don't be an asshole

Primo
I am planning the driving trip. Do you have anything going on November 17 or 18? I am not sure yet about exactly when to leave. It would be nice if you could drop me at the airport to pick up a car (in this case, cheaper than the Hertz place in [the place on your way to work]). I could take the bus there, but that would be a pain. In the worst case, I guess I could take the bus there, drive home and pack the car, and then leave. (I would not want to carry everything with me.)

Primo
I just talked to my mom's cousin about visiting her.

Primo
She asked whether you would be with me. I don't think my parents caused her to have a bad impression of you.

Primo
Hey!

Primo
Now is a good time for me to discuss plans for the trip.

Me
I could drop you at the place on my way to to work

Me
Tell your mom's cousin I am working and cannot take vacation - that my vacation is really limited

Primo
I know, sweetie.

Primo
[the place on your way to work] is much more expensive than the airport, oddly.

Me
OK - but how much inconvenience are we expected to endure

Primo
So maybe you could go out of your way on the way to work?

Me
to save the estate a few dollars?

Me
or maybe the estate could pay a little more so it's easier for us

Me
and for me

Primo
Picking up at the airport also benefits me because they have an area where I can choose a car (instead of just having to accept whatever they give me).

Me
then it will need to be after work

Primo
You couldn't go there on your way to work?

Me
it would mean leaving the house at the crack of dawn

Me
which you would not like

Me
I have 8 a.m meetings those days that I cannot miss

Primo
You couldn't get in to work just a bit later than usual? (20 minutes?)

Primo
Oh, every day?

Me
no - I cannot miss these meetings

Me
it is the quarterly reviews

Me
I have to be ther

Me
e

Me
Laverne is all lovey

Me
she sat on me and purred while I was watching tov

Primo
Every day at 8 for how long?

Primo
She loves you.

Me
and she followed me upstairs and is sitting by me rubbing her head on me

Me
17th for sure

Me
Sweetie

Me
we can go after work

Primo
And if you have an 8:00 meeting, you don't want to be walking into the building at 7:50.

Me
And I do not want to deal with you having to meet a scheduled

Me
schedule

Me
and the morning traffic

Primo
Because I don't do it right.

Me
I just don't want to do it, sweetie

Me
it is too hard on me

Primo
It is a hardship to have only one car.

Me
it is a hardship for you to be the executor of this estate

Me
it is a real hardship

Me
and you are suffering because of it

Primo
Maybe we can pick up the car on Tuesday, the 17th after you get home?

Me
OK

In which I tell Primo we have to get our affairs in order so that when we die, my sister is not stuck spending months dealing with our crap

Primo
I have been going through papers for months. I finally finished last night around 3:30. And some of them (a small percentage) were only partially sorted and will end up at home! My parents didn't do it right.

Me
nope

Me
we cannot leave that kind of mess for Jenny

Primo
I promise to go through anything that goes home with me quickly.

Me
good

Me
I will help

Primo
Jenny lives faster than you. She may die first.

Me
you are once again missing the point

Primo
If only we had kids so that we could burden someone with a job like this.

Primo
It would be different for a sibling.

Me
it is selfish not to have your affairs in order

Me
nobody should be burdened like this

Me
someone else could cut our grass and shovel snow, too

Me
if only

Primo
They were going to get around to it someday. Just not "today," whenever that was.

Me
yeah well look how that worked out

Primo
There was no deadline. Why act if there is no deadline?

Primo
What did you mean about our grass and snow?

Me
there was a dead line

Me
they were going to be dead someday

Me
and nobody knows the hour and the day

Me
a kid could cut our grass and shovel snow

In which Sly complains that the union is doing him wrong

Primo: I found all these old emails, which I have put in the recycling. My dad was angry that he had not advanced in his career. And he was angry that the union promoted people based on seniority and not competence.

Me: And how does one measure competence in academia? You have to define an objective measure. Look how much of a battle tenure is!

Primo: He thought it was unfair.

Me: You don't get to pick and choose when you are in a union.

Primo: He said academia was different from a factory floor and that incompetence should not be protected.

Me: Incompetence should not be protected anywhere, especially on a factory floor! And unions have no place in academia - it is not production work that can be easily measured.

Primo: My dad spent a lot of time on faculty development. He was really interested in the theory and the practice. They got this new department chair who assigned my dad to teach two sections of Shakespeare. My dad was upset about it.

Me: Why?

Primo: I guess he wanted to teach something else. So he wrote to the chair. The chair said he had looked at all the recent peer-reviewed journals and had not found anything my dad had written. And then he said maybe if my dad weren't so busy being Faculty Czar, he would have time for research.

Me: Ouch! Straight for the jugular!

Primo: But my dad was doing research!

Me: Yes, but he was doing organizational behavior research, not English literature research. You advance in academia by contributing to the field of knowledge in your field. Your dad's field was not org behavior.

In which we learn that Ted has been financially irresponsible for decades

Primo: I found a bunch of correspondence between my parents and Ted from 20 years ago.

Me: Why am I not surprised?

Primo: My dad was really angry.

Me: Why?

Primo: This was in a "Ted" folder - printed out emails.

Me: They moved that stuff to Florida?

Primo: They had a metal file box of all their check registers since the 70s.

Me: Oh good grief.

Primo: So my dad kept track of stuff with Ted. He had co-signed for a credit card for Ted after Ted lost his job.

Me: Why?

Primo: Because Ted had really bad credit.

Me: Oh man. I would never dream of asking my parents to co-sign on a credit card. But then, I would never have bad credit. If you are middle class and well educated with a decent job and health insurance, you have no reason to have bad credit except financial mismanagement. You are living beyond your means. Even if you lose your job, you should not be plunged into penury. You don't live at your means, ever - you save in case you lose your job.

Primo: So my dad co-signed and then Ted and Ted'sWife had like a six thousand dollar bill at Dean and Delucca.

Me: How did your dad know? Wait? They were broke and had bad credit and thought that shopping at at a gourmet food store was a good idea?

Primo: You know Ted. He deserves the good stuff. He got the bills.

Me: Was he paying the bills? Because even though he was the co-signer, it wasn't his business how Ted spends his money.

Primo: Somehow, Ted got the credit limit raised from a thousand or two to six thousand.

Me: Without your dad's agreement?

Primo: Yes.

Me: OK I am on your dad's side on this. And you know that's a big deal. Ted is a jerk.

Primo: And he has not changed. He still lives beyond his means. Even back then, he was complaining about having to sell his frequent flier miles. He was that broke, but he was shopping at Dean and Delucca?