Saturday, December 5, 2015

In which Ted and Ted'sWife are so grabby that they almost make Jack cry and he leaves because he cannot stand how they are acting

You guys! I can't believe I didn't write about this part. (I am writing this in December, realizing I left out so much when I wrote the other posts in August.)

1. Ted and TW came over to Sly and Doris' house after lunch. They called Stephanie and Jack's son and told him he could take care of his cousin, Ted and TW's son, while Ted and TW did stuff at Sly and Doris'.

They do that. They dump their kid on other people without asking. They call Stephanie and tell her how much their son wants to be with his cousins, which is true, but their solution is not for the cousins to join them but for their son to stay with Stephanie and her kids. Ted'sSon cannot be unsupervised. It is not fair to ask a recent college graduate to assume that responsibility. But they do it.

2. TW suggests that we throw things away, which is great. But then she starts dibbsing things she wants to take home, like an old dresser in Doris' room. Ted starts dibbsing things he wants to take home. They want things like dressers and bookshelves.

I stay in the kitchen with Jack, throwing away all of the spices and half the food and putting the rest in bags for Stephanie. Jack and I want nothing to do with the dibbsing, except I do say a few times, "Maria and [my nephew] have just finished college and will be setting up apartments. Maybe they should have these things."

But Ted and TW's are all excited about old, not very nice furniture.

"Let's have this bookcase shipped home," he suggests to his wife.

I can't keep my mouth shut. "That's going to cost a lot of money!"

He shrugs. "The estate will pay for it."

Now I really can't keep my mouth shut. "I don't think estates usually pay for that kind of thing," I say.

"Oh sure it will!" he answers. "TW's mother's estate is paying to ship things to us."

TW's mother is not dead. What is really happening is that TW's mother is paying.

3. We are in Sly and Doris's bedroom. TW picks up a purse, opens it, pulls out the wallet, starts rifling through the wallet, pulling out photos, etc.

"Whose wallet is this?" she asks in curiosity.

Then she sees the driver's license. "Oh! Doris!"

Primo's voice is ice cold as he puts out his hand. "That's my mother's purse. Give. It. To. Me. Please."

4. We spend hours cleaning and throwing away. I have not bathed. Primo has not bathed. We are all going out to dinner. I wait for Ted and TW's to leave so Primo and I can bathe and dress and go to the restaurant.

"But they're staying here until it's time to go to the restaurant," he says.

"What!" I hiss. "They need to LEAVE! There is no way for me to get from the bathroom to the guest room unseen. I don't want to have to take all my clothes into the bathroom!"

TW's opens a bottle of wine and sits down.

I guess they are not leaving.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Ugh!! Ted is seriously making me rage...I honestly can't even

  3. Geez, does Ted have ANY clue that the reason wills are written is because not every estate is to be handled the same way over and above the basic distribution of assets? That different provisions are written into wills to cover the specifics of things like who pays the shipping costs (hint: if it's not in there, it's not the estate's responsibility)?

    1. Oh Cat. Just wait until you see what else Ted thinks the estate should pay for.

    2. Ted can think that he shits gold ingots, but that doesn't mean that anyone will take one as payment. The only reason he persists in his delusions is because sometimes people give in to him when he makes his demands. I hope Primo can set and enforce boundaries with him.

    3. Possible estate payments -
      1. Shipping of items
      2. Hotel room of family for funeral
      2. Travel expenses for family to funeral (plane, car, gas)
      4. Food for family while in area for funeral
      5. Funeral clothes for family
      6. Any expenses associated with talking to Primo or Jack about the estate and funeral (someone has to pay for those phone calls/texts)
      7. Compensation for his time spent on any and/or all of the above

      I am very interested in seeing if any of my list is correct and what I possible didn't think of.

    4. 8. Attorney's fees for lawsuit to get his "share" of the estate because Primo didn't "follow through on his instructions from Sly about changing the will".

    5. You guys are just spooky! It's like you are reading ahead!

    6. On one side of my family, we have my dad's cousin who sued my great-uncle's estate, because she did not think that she and her children had been allotted a fair portion (despite the fact that they people who had gotten more had done a lot more for him in his last years, including building an addition onto their house at their expense, so that he could live with them relatively independently).

      My grandfather (his BIL), in his role as executor decided to settle an extra portion with her because A) He didn't think my great-uncle would have appreciated his money going to lawyers, and B) he wanted peace.

      Same cousin BEGGED to be able to host the aftermeal for same grandfather's funeral. Seriously - pushed for how important it would be to her to be able to do this for us (the more closely connected relatives).

      This part will probably seem familiar: She and her husband had a couple of catered trays of bagels and fruit platters, and submitted the bills for the food to the estate.

      A number of us went back to my parents' house after that (pre-arranged), for a more comfortable atmosphere - complete with a more generous outlay of stuff to eat.

      - AC

    7. Just in case Liz's #7 didn't cover it, don't forget that Ted should be paid for the 100 hours of time he spent writing Sly's eulogy!

  4. It always amazes me how cheap some people can be.

  5. Let's see...there is a purse in the house of a male/female couple who were married for years and years. In the purse is a wallet. I wonder whose purse and wallet that could have been. Hmmmmm...let me ponder that for one second BEFORE going through the purse that is quite obviously Doris's.

    Unless she thought she was going through your purse, why the heck did she feel the need to rifle through it and then ask when the answer was pretty obvious?

    1. I do not know. It was so rude!

      Maybe she was looking for the Good Bracelet. You will be hearing about that.

  6. Exactly, Jessica.
    I wondered if Ted and Tedswife were so antsy to get in the house because they were hoping to find money stashed in books...cookie jars...wallets. and finder's keeper's, right (TedsRules TM)
    Poor Jack. It's like watching vultures descending.

    1. I hadn't even thought of that! But yes - it makes perfect sense.