Primo: Guess who was on my email list from my first campaign six years ago?
Me: I don't know!
Me: Ted who?
Primo: Ted my brother!
Me: Oh man.
Primo: He gave me money! Fifty dollars!
Primo: I think it's time to bury the hatchet.
Me: Are you nuts?
Primo: That's a meaningful gesture!
Me: No. A meaningful gesture is an apology for being a jerk.
Primo: He's a Drunk. This is about as meaningful as someone related to my dad can get.