Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Ch 5 Day after Christmas I go to the mission with Stephanie and her dad and he is nice to me, which makes me think that maybe I am not the problem with Sly and Doris

Stephanie: My dad and I are going to the lighthouse museum. I’m a volunteer there, so we can get in for free. Do you and Primo want to go with us? The kids don’t want to go.

Me: Yes! I love lighthouses. Primo and I have wanted to see this one and just haven’t gone yet. We’ve been too busy doing Sly and Doris’ chores. Primo, do you want to go?

Primo: Are you kidding? I need to spend time with my mom and dad. If I leave them to see Stephanie's dad, I’ll never hear the end of it.

Me: How about if I go? Then they can have you all to themselves.

Primo: You know they’re going to complain that you’re avoiding them.

Me: And so? They’ll complain if I stay, too.

Primo: Go. We don’t both have to be miserable.

Stephanie and her dad ring the doorbell half an hour later.

Stephanie'sDad hugs Doris: I had to say “hi” to you. How are you, dear?

Doris smiles and hugs back.

Stephanie'sDad barely makes eye contact with Sly as he shakes his hand.

Ha. Stephanie'sDad knows.

Stephanie turns on the car radio: Oh, Frank Sinatra! I love Frank Sinatra!

Stephanie'sDad : Wonderful voice.

Stephanie: Do you know what Sly said to me once? He said that Sinatra had no talent! None! That he was crap!

Me: He told Primo that Paul McCartney can’t sing. And that Olivia Newton-John has a pleasant enough voice but she is too “breathy.” He can’t bear for someone else to be recognized.

Stephanie: He is envious of everyone. He has to be the big cheese.


  1. Discovered your blog via CaptainAwkward and the archives have been my exclusive reading because 1) it's a good story 2) well-told and 3) the degree of familycrazy is familiar to me. I am particularly enjoying the introduction of Stephanie'sDad as I (Midwesterner) married into a family with South Philly roots and thought the same thing about "gravy" the first time I heard it in that context.

    1. Thank you for your kind words, SamKD, although I am very sorry that you know this familycrazy stuff. But I am glad that I am not the only one in the world who didn't know "gravy!"

  2. So what do they call actual gravy?