I pick Jenny up from the airport. We take a slow drive along the river, then stop at a coffee shop with outdoor seating. The sun is sparkling on the waves and it is too pretty to hurry back to the house.
And, you know, I just don’t want to deal with Sly and Doris.
Me: I don’t like coffee. I’ll just get a diet Coke.
Jenny: Try the mocha. My treat.
Me: I don’t drink coffee.
Jenny: It’s like hot chocolate with caffeine. Just try it. There’s whipped cream on the top.
She is paying and it is my wedding week, so calories don’t count. Well why not? She buys a mocha for me and a soy latte for herself – that’s what people who are truly lactose intolerant do – and we sit outside in the sun, enjoying the peace.
She is right. The mocha is fabulous. Mocha: My new best friend.
Me: You won’t believe Primo’s parents. They say they’re lactose intolerant, but they didn’t want soy milk. They made me buy Lactaid for them, but they’ve been eating our expensive cheese for a snack every day. Don’t say anything to them.
Jenny: Like I would. But you know what? You can be lactose intolerant and eat cheese.
Me: No you can’t. Cheese has lactose.
Jenny: And you are an authority on this how? I’m lactose intolerant. I know. Some people are more lactose intolerant than others. Lactose intolerance can change throughout the day. It is possible to be lactose intolerant of milk and not of cheese.
Me: You’re kidding.
Jenny: Nope. I’m not. You should have hidden that cheese behind the regular milk so they couldn’t find it. You blew it.
I sure did. I hate being wrong. Well, they are still wrong for skipping lunch and then filling up on my expensive cheese instead of waiting for supper.